NEO

Finally ma bro is with me… he is on a two days leave from his training. I’m pretty happy to see him after a Christmas which marked his absence. We, mom and me, prepared a fine dinner for him and had dinner together after a period of almost three months.

These days my mind is always thinking about my financial status. It leads ma mind to some conclusions about this world. We heard the word ‘change’ more than usual during last president’s election of US. It was from the ‘buildup messiah of change’ by name, Mr. Obama. Our world is changed or in other words turned to a commercial space, now we can call it a ‘Market’, where you needs a big pocket even for your basic necessities. The call of bus owners to hike the bus charge is the very recent example. World is almost full of fake smiles and men with masks on their face. Nowadays cash is the real messiah. You need it to survive. Yes life is all about survival. I am surviving now.

Eight days ago we welcomed the New Year. Fresh start, but think it’s not gonna be easy breezy like last time. It’s going to be a challenging one. I already prepared for that, done couple of changes in my priorities, it is not going perfect but better. I’m happy for that. After the attack of fever in the December `09 I actually relaxed bit. But now am engaged, have couple of responsible roles to perform at different levels such as youth movement at my parish and for the film festival at Aluva. Also am looking upon my profession. Need to prepare hard, gulping all those stuffs learned during last two years, to face the world after completing social work training on this May.

O’ how can I forget to tell about the talk I listened to, last day? It was during the inauguration of our association of Social work students (SWAS) at campus. Talk was by Mr. Civic Chandran, who put forward the real facts about our society. It was an interesting one. He talked about the importance of social work profession in social activism like the movements at Atirapilly, Marayoor, Chengara et cetera. He also had his words on moral policing in Kerala, role of youth today and about the empowerment issues. BTW ma last days passed away and now it’s the time for me to gave ma physical part some rest, so that I can wake up tomorrow with more energy. O’ god, pls keep me under your wings. Bah bye….

Towards the end, for a fresh start...

Sometimes our life is too short to let the ones we love know that we really care. It is hard and time now is too short to let the one know that I really value. Yes, one more year passing by. But, the distance seems larger by each passing day. Can I do any justice to ma own feelings????? Why am I branded wrong??????? These questions come up sometimes to ma mind.

BTW, December as usual ready to go home with a year. After couple of days 2009 will say farewell. For last few days, had enough of gulping down the cakes....... Christmas was unique this time. Absence of bro for the first time made Christmas less spicy. Even the plan to make crib dropped due to that.

May be the one year experience has changed me a lot. I'm no longer known for ma frankness, instead for ma diplomatic approach. 2009 is full of memories, experience, and learning. And after all those, comes twenty ten which is going to be one of the crucial phases of ma life. Life is like a radio, u ought to hear whatever the station plays for you but, I wish if my life was like an I-pod so that I can shuffle based on ma choice...............no matter what, life moves on............

I LOVE U DECEMBER

Don't feel like am able to write. All the words are getting locked up in ma mind. Feels like I’ve got long way to go...............
I'm just too lazy to write now. The only reason why I'm filling up the gap is that I don't like the page to be blank. Each day is a memory and not filling up the blog for one day (or atleast once a week) makes me feel that I’ve missed a chance to revisit ma life at some point in the future.
What I really need now is some peace of mind. I know it’s hard to find any. Just a break from ma daily routine of hurry Barry to little more relaxing one, it is the truth i am loosing up. Now it’s hard to recollect how I multi-tasked things, sometimes missing out, energy I felt and those busy but cheerful moments.............
December is here, Jingles started sounding and am preparing for Christmas. I already started decorating ma house for Christmas, Would like to make a crib in the front. Christmas time is always something I love. But this time will miss my bro…
I started December by a camp at Nilumbur, Malappuram, where I did camping to learn Participatory Rural Appraisal, as a part of my social work training. It is a beautiful place to go for outing. Camping was superb, but don’t want to remember last hours when I was molested by Mr. Fever and was down. The days before that at camp was awesome, I enjoyed many moments starting from mock social mapping. I can’t forget those three group games conducted by our teachers. Hope the whole group enjoyed. The best thing that I enjoyed was the Team efforts. One day ma team worked until 3 am. It was the best time I had at camp. Saw people supporting each other and completing the duties at time.
If not, the people around me, I would have lost ma dreams and the will long before. At each stage of ma life I had people, giving me a hand to hold on to and I can't thank them enough. Life at Sanskrit University is also proving the same. Had some good friends in the beginning and when the relationship slow downed now I have new ones. Thank god.
It is always sad to remember that after five months all these birds will flyaway to their own destination. Each of us must start doing things to make rest of the days ‘cherishable’. Adieu…