THE PROPOSAL: SHORT STORY

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I was on my way back to home after attending the morning Holy mass at my parish church. When I reached the Post Office junction, I saw a boy and a girl talking to each other. Boy was extremely nervous standing before her. I decided to watch them for a moment and sat on the bench on the road side. Suddenly the boy stood on his one knee and quickly took out a red rose out of his shirt. All of a sudden the scene that's happening before me brought a smile on my face and it reminded me of a September morning. The day I proposed my girl. That day, that moment, helped me now to be a proud husband of a great wife. I prayed a while for the couple, who is just going to start their love life and continued walking to my home.

One Month In!

Love before Marriage! It's been a great journey for both of us. We shared our stories every day, we prayed together, we were together in happiness and in sorrow, and we dreamed a life together. Yes! We were preparing for the 'Life after marriage'.
Can't forgot the last couple of months. Let us take this opportunity to thank everyone who were there for us. Especially our Parents, Brothers (Akhil Paul & Anil Jose), our relatives (Especially Antony Uncle, Francis Uncle, Fr. Francis, Saju Pepan, Lloyid, Sheri Cheattan.... (oopz! the list goes on and on), and friends (Special mention to Varun Paul, Thomson Varghese, Edison Varghese, Jomon Moonjely, Midhun, Dikil, Prajeesh, Ajith, & Joe). Thank You all for your efforts!
Completed our first month as husband and wife. We're slowly coming back to business. Both of us joined back our work.

But it doesn’t feel different.

Which is fine, because our relationship was awesome. It hasn’t changed at all. Every once in a while there’s the little thrill of thinking of her as “wife” but even that is not as exciting as I expected it to be. The fact is, we have felt committed to each other for life. We both knew. Just completely knew that this was it.
But it still doesn’t quite feel real to us. We said vows. We went through two ceremonies. But I think it will take a lot of calling each other “husband” and “wife” for it is too hard for me to hide that little smile. So far it's been a wonderful breeze and we hope it will stick around for the life ahead. Thanks Again!

#ThankYouSachin

I'm a die hard fan of Sachin Tendulkar. It was a privilege for me to watch him play cricket. His fours were my fours, his sixes were my sixes, and his centuries, no doubt, they were my centuries too. His achievements were mine too and it made me proud. Even I told my soul-mate that I won't marry before his retirement from the game. Because I know otherwise she won't get cent percent of me. I never ever thought of cricket without this man. For me he is the cricket almighty. But I know I must accept the reality. He has to take the exit now and won't return. I had big plans for this day. Unfortunately my pocket is too small these days, and I'm too busy with my personal life. Therefore I went to church today participated in the holy mass, prayed for him, and thanked almighty for this wonderful gift for me, and for the nation. #ThankYouSachin

UNION BUDGET 2013-14

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Spent yesterday morning listening to our Finance Minister P Chidambaram presenting the Union Budget 2013. In the evening listened to the views of various politicians on the budget. Instead of coming up with a critique on budget, ruling party leaders were busy with justifying the budget and the opposition with the usual blame game. Anyway I don't want to know any political games. I believe there is plenty of food for every ministry to chew upon. But the questions in my mind remain the same, How efficiently they are going to utilize it? and also how much will reach to the grassroots level?

Well I'm going to trust the words of our PM during his post budget interaction with Dooradarshan News,
"And I am pretty certain that the mood of the country is: this country must not lose any time. It must get its act together to accelerate the tempo of economic growth, sustainable growth, equitable growth, and I do believe that if the general mood of the country is right, it will infect the bureaucracy, it will infect the Opposition, and in this task, there are no winners or no losers. If India succeeds in sticking to a growth path of 8 percent or more, I think the winners will be the people of India; winners will be our young men and young women, who desperately need new productive job opportunities."
Amen!

Sunday

Another Sunday in OUR life is going to say bye in couple of hours. It's been a calm day. Started by participating in the Holy Mass. Then visited Bamboo Festival that happened at Kaloor JN Stadium. Followed by a sound nap in the afternoon. Now reading about The 2012 Phenomenon. Planing to catch sleep in few hours. Hope you all had a wonderful December Sunday! Night & God Bless! :)

Until death do us part

"Thank you my honey bunch for everything that you have poured on me. Especially for your unconditional love and care, for trusting me, for helping me take good decisions, for being my shore during the tough times, and the list goes on... Don't know what to scribble down honey...
I do promise to be true. I would like to be with you to have and to hold, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, until death do us part. I LOVE YOU!"

Watching everybody else live theirs

Scribbling down my life here in this blog, where once I used to visit often, seems difficult these days. Nowadays everything has been narrowed down to 160 characters. But I don't want to miss my blog, so I will try to be here whenever it is possible and put all those life events in this magic box. So that we could came back at a later stage of life and revisit those footprints of us.
Days went by when I felt so happy and content, and confident that my life would be okay, and then as quickly as the feeling came it would disappear and I would feel sadness coming in again. I tried to find a routine that I could fit in to, so that I felt as through I belonged in my body and my body in line with this life. I want to stop wandering like a zombie, watching everybody else live theirs. Would like to spend remainder of April trying to get my life into some order. God Bless!

Holy God. Holy God. Holy Mighty One. Holy Immortal One, have mercy on us.

Its Good Friday! am trying to understand at what cost Christ has won our redemption. Just returned from my parish church after all the solemn ceremonies of Good Friday, the Adoration of the Cross, in the chanting of the 'Reproaches', the reading of the Passion. Also received the pre-consecrated Host. Today we should unite ourselves to our Savior, and must contemplate our own death to sin in the Death of our Lord.

PARISH FIESTA 2012

“Oh, Kaprassery, gem of the region,
We will stand with pride and dignity,
We will watch your fragile beauty,
With much love and care . . . ”

It’s fiesta days in Kaprassery once more.… It brings to us in a hundred and one memories; some happy and some sad. It reminds me of the well decorated and illuminated face of our parish church, old and familiar faces of parishioners and people in the distant beyond, some lost and half forgotten, but most of all those that I love and long to be with.

Kaprassery is my home village, nestled in between the two major towns of the Indian state Kerala, i.e. Aluva and Angamaly. Parish was established in the year 1976. It is named Little Flower Church after the Saint Therese of Lisieux (LittleFlower)… How does a Kaprasserian celebrate a Parish fiesta?

Kaprassery celebrates its parish fiesta every first weekend of February in honour of her patroness Saint Therese of Lisieux (Little Flower) and of St. Sebastian. This most awaited weekend is preceded by nine days evening novena and holy mass. These days, you will find the pious and devoted Kaprasserians offering their prayers, thanks giving for the blessings granted upon their family and nation by the loving God with the intercession of our Lady.

The celebration is doubly blessed and become more significant in the parish church which has been the center of the life of a Kaprasserian. By the end of ninth day, folks decorate their frontage of house and village roads with tender coconut leaves and with the plantain trunk. Soon the much awaited weekend arrives and celebration begins by hosting papal flag in front of the church and holy mass follows. Later in the evening parishioners comes up with a bunch of beautiful cultural programs and the real celebration begins as each and every devotee and guest is welcomed in the heart and homes of my village folks in the unique charm and Kaprassery hospitality. Saturday procession, after celebrating the holy mass, is something everyone participates with lot of devotion and pride…

The sharing of laughters, all the eating and the drinking! What a weekend! But by Sunday evening, the host smiles with pride and joy for another merry making that had soon come to pass. Once again memories are made in the hearts of each Kaprasserians.

 As the village of Kaprassery celebrates its annual parish church fiesta this year the activities are set through the leadership of our parish priest and parish fest committee…

Happy Fiesta to all!

IN FOND MEMORY OF 2011

A year full of ups and downs is going to bid goodbye… magic of love, higher education, bro @ UK, new friends, new places… It was an awesome year. When I turn back to recollect what happened… There will be a smile on my face for sure….

First half of the year gave a lot of happy moments… but second half was full of mixed emotions… eyes become wet most of the times… when September 3^rd arrived with the magic of love… got super excited and went far from reality… but October pulled me down to earth…. Some crucial decisions… Arrrhhhh! I don’t wanna go through it again…

It wasn’t full of disappointments really… Got a superb holiday at Bangalore, opportunity to learn at one of the major university of the state… New professional contacts… Can’t forget the company and support from the juniors at my parish church… They really worked hard to add colours to the celebrations at parish church…Thank You guys!!! You were really superb….May God bless you all with a bright future…

Oh! How can I forget the last day of the year….. Wowww! It was really good…

Hope all of you had a lovely year… May God bless you all with a year of happiness and fulfilment...

Before concluding this post I would like to put forward before you this quote….

“At the end of this year, … before leaving its days and hours to God and his just and merciful judgment, I feel a very strong need in my heart to elevate our thanks to Him and his love for us.”

- Pope Benedict XVI (1927- present)

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!

MARRIED OR NOT… YOU SHOULD READ THIS!

Hai guys,  here is something I saw on the internet.. I thought I would share this here because I believe it is clearly explaining the importance of little things that make our life beautiful… So pls go through it… If you find this interesting, inspiring… pls share it on your, blog, tumblr, facebook, twitter or any other web space… I also hope that your mouth will definitely find time to share it in the real world…

Here it is;

[

 “When I got home that night as my wife served dinner, I held her hand and said, I’ve got something to tell you. She sat down and ate quietly. Again I observed the hurt in her eyes.

Suddenly I didn’t know how to open my mouth. But I had to let her know what I was thinking. I want a divorce. I raised the topic calmly. She didn’t seem to be annoyed by my words, instead she asked me softly, why?

I avoided her question. This made her angry. She threw away the chopsticks and shouted at me, you are not a man! That night, we didn’t talk to each other. She was weeping. I knew she wanted to find out what had happened to our marriage. But I could hardly give her a satisfactory answer; she had lost my heart to Jane. I didn’t love her anymore. I just pitied her!

With a deep sense of guilt, I drafted a divorce agreement which stated that she could own our house, our car, and 30% stake of my company. She glanced at it and then tore it into pieces. The woman who had spent ten years of her life with me had become a stranger. I felt sorry for her wasted time, resources and energy but I could not take back what I had said for I loved Jane so dearly. Finally she cried loudly in front of me, which was what I had expected to see. To me her cry was actually a kind of release. The idea of divorce which had obsessed me for several weeks seemed to be firmer and clearer now.

The next day, I came back home very late and found her writing something at the table. I didn’t have supper but went straight to sleep and fell asleep very fast because I was tired after an eventful day with Jane. When I woke up, she was still there at the table writing. I just did not care so I turned over and was asleep again.

In the morning she presented her divorce conditions: she didn’t want anything from me, but needed a month’s notice before the divorce. She requested that in that one month we both struggle to live as normal a life as possible. Her reasons were simple: our son had his exams in a month’s time and she didn’t want to disrupt him with our broken marriage.

This was agreeable to me. But she had something more, she asked me to recall how I had carried her into out bridal room on our wedding day. She requested that every day for the month’s duration I carry her out of our bedroom to the front door ever morning. I thought she was going crazy. Just to make our last days together bearable I accepted her odd request.

I told Jane about my wife’s divorce conditions. . She laughed loudly and thought it was absurd. No matter what tricks she applies, she has to face the divorce, she said scornfully.

My wife and I hadn’t had any body contact since my divorce intention was explicitly expressed. So when I carried her out on the first day, we both appeared clumsy. Our son clapped behind us, daddy is holding mommy in his arms. His words brought me a sense of pain. From the bedroom to the sitting room, then to the door, I walked over ten meters with her in my arms. She closed her eyes and said softly; don’t tell our son about the divorce. I nodded, feeling somewhat upset. I put her down outside the door. She went to wait for the bus to work. I drove alone to the office.

On the second day, both of us acted much more easily. She leaned on my chest. I could smell the fragrance of her blouse. I realized that I hadn’t looked at this woman carefully for a long time. I realized she was not young any more. There were fine wrinkles on her face, her hair was graying! Our marriage had taken its toll on her. For a minute I wondered what I had done to her.

On the fourth day, when I lifted her up, I felt a sense of intimacy returning. This was the woman who had given ten years of her life to me. On the fifth and sixth day, I realized that our sense of intimacy was growing again. I didn’t tell Jane about this. It became easier to carry her as the month slipped by. Perhaps the everyday workout made me stronger.

She was choosing what to wear one morning. She tried on quite a few dresses but could not find a suitable one. Then she sighed, all my dresses have grown bigger. I suddenly realized that she had grown so thin, that was the reason why I could carry her more easily.

Suddenly it hit me… she had buried so much pain and bitterness in her heart. Subconsciously I reached out and touched her head.

Our son came in at the moment and said, Dad, it’s time to carry mom out. To him, seeing his father carrying his mother out had become an essential part of his life. My wife gestured to our son to come closer and hugged him tightly. I turned my face away because I was afraid I might change my mind at this last minute. I then held her in my arms, walking from the bedroom, through the sitting room, to the hallway. Her hand surrounded my neck softly and naturally. I held her body tightly; it was just like our wedding day.

But her much lighter weight made me sad. On the last day, when I held her in my arms I could hardly move a step. Our son had gone to school. I held her tightly and said, I hadn’t noticed that our life lacked intimacy. I drove to office…. jumped out of the car swiftly without locking the door. I was afraid any delay would make me change my mind…I walked upstairs. Jane opened the door and I said to her, Sorry, Jane, I do not want the divorce anymore.

She looked at me, astonished, and then touched my forehead. Do you have a fever? She said. I moved her hand off my head. Sorry, Jane, I said, I won’t divorce. My marriage life was boring probably because she and I didn’t value the details of our lives, not because we didn’t love each other anymore. Now I realize that since I carried her into my home on our wedding day I am supposed to hold her until death do us apart. Jane seemed to suddenly wake up. She gave me a loud slap and then slammed the door and burst into tears. I walked downstairs and drove away. At the floral shop on the way, I ordered a bouquet of flowers for my wife. The salesgirl asked me what to write on the card. I smiled and wrote, I’ll carry you out every morning until death do us apart.

That evening I arrived home, flowers in my hands, a smile on my face, I run up stairs, only to find my wife in the bed - dead. My wife had been fighting CANCER for months and I was so busy with Jane to even notice. She knew that she would die soon and she wanted to save me from the whatever negative reaction from our son, in case we push through with the divorce.— At least, in the eyes of our son—- I’m a loving husband….

The small details of your lives are what really matter in a relationship. It is not the mansion, the car, property, the money in the bank. These create an environment conducive for happiness but cannot give happiness in themselves.

So find time to be your spouse’s friend and do those little things for each other that build intimacy. Do have a real happy marriage!

]

SHE, AS I SEE....

Her smile is worth a thousand ghazals,

Her eyes are worth a thousand shining stars,

Nectar flows from her lips,

And her hair, like Niagara falls.

Her beauty pierces through my heart,

And her charisma halts my wandering eyes;

I want to hold her hands till my last breath,

And die chanting her name.

Thanks to my lil sister SK

GRIEF

I have always known her to be strong and to see her allowing herself to become weak, it frightens me… just seeing her become sicker, and seeing that she is really going older, it frightens the hell out of me….

BRIGHT STAR

Stars are shining,

Stars are smiling,

Showing me the bright side of life,

You...

How can I keep you apart,

When you're close to my heart.

How can we be like two worlds apart,

When a world is built for us.

You were my world,

You were my dreams,

And still is.

Yes! You rule my heart.

Sincere thanks to my friend: Shilpa Krishnan

UJALA VANDI AND MEMORIES OF CHILDHOOD

“The child is the father of man”- Wordsworth

By the above line Wordsworth obviously meant was that the productiveness of an adult depends on the opportunities he has had to grow and develop as a child. It shows the importance of childhood in ones development.

Childhood is the sweetest of all other stages in our entire life. I believe everyone will agree to that. We carry a lot of memories from it. Today we might be a Teacher, Doctor, Engineer, Social Worker, Nurse, or Entrepreneur etc. But the faculty of wonder, innocence, laughter etc. that we had enjoyed as a kid, is a treasure forever.

Last day I made an ‘Ujala Vandi’(a toy vehicle made out of the bottle of famous whitening solution for clothes and the cut chapel) for my nephew. His amusement and cute smile after being the proud owner of the toy brought to me the memories of my childhood days. Now, whenever I see him with his toy, I wish I were a child again.

So if you are feeling pain or sick of the complexities that our modern world brings to us; just turn the pages to your childhood days, by playing with children, going through your childhood pictures, sharing your memories with your partner. You will soon be gifted with the contentment.

More than everything, you must always carry a child in your heart… It will definitely bring smiles on your face…

“With every child we are born again and we play in the courtyard of the world in the bright sunshine of love and laughter.”